Friday, January 22, 2010

News Story Of The Day: Aliens Easier To Find Than Mates In London

You might be too picky if...

Oh, and if you want an alien mate, then you're doubly screwed.

From NewsDaily.

Love In London As Rare As Finding Aliens

Jan. 19, 2010 (Reuters) — Romance may happen every day, but finding true love in London is as rare as aliens in the galaxy, says one London-based economist.

Peter Backus, a teaching fellow of economics at the University of Warwick, has calculated that he has a 0.00034 percent chance of finding love in the British capital using the same "Drake" equation scientists use to determine the potential number of extra-terrestrials in our galaxy.

American astronomer and astrophysicist Frank Drake devised his namesake equation in the early 1960s.

The 31-year-old Backus -- who lives on a narrow boat in central London -- is not even that particular about his ideal match, requiring only that she be a London-based female, aged 24-34, with a university education.

"I am not trying to be an elitist or anything," he said about his educational requirements. "Everyone has preferences. I just think we would have more in common."

Further reducing his chances, he has estimated he would be physically attracted to just five percent of the women meeting all these criteria.

This means there are about 10,500 women in Britain who tick all the boxes for Backus, he said -- just above the 10,000 potential communicative civilizations that could exist in the Milky Way according to the Drake equation.

(story continues here)

Craigslist Ad Of The Day: To The Girl Throwing Up From Her Cab

best of craigslist > SF bay area >

To the girl throwing up from her cab - m4w

Date: 2009-11-27, 11:47AM PST

You were discharging a Thanksgiving days feast worth of vittles and booze onto the pavement of Market while I cheered you on from the car behind yours.

You played your part perfectly: encumbering the city with freshly minted aromas of regurgitated cranberry sauce and vodka. I played mine with equal grace, impregnating the vacant morning air with the clamorous hootings of a drunkard.

It was a moment we shared that we will always have. They can never take that away from us.

Please don't ever change.

PostingID: 1484202580

Classic 70s Music Video Of The Day: Eyes

A rare glimpse of Hell's cafeteria. Nice glasses, Bob. Are those Foster Grants?

I think this was Bob's follow-up to his hit, "Sentimental Lady." That one sucked, too. Bob was an early member of Fleetwood Mac but couldn't grow a big enough 'fro, so they sacked him for Lindsey Buckingham. Not really. I don't know why Bob left FM, and don't really care. Sorry, just being honest.

Fun With Stereotypes Of The Day: Security Threat Levels

This one does a fine job of including more nationalities than these things usually do. Bravo!

From Laura, who lives in the Caymans. Bitch.

The ENGLISH are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance." The last time the English issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588 when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The SCOTS raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The FRENCH government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability. It's not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert.

ITALY has increased the alert level from "Loud and Excited Shouting" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Commence Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The GERMANS also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbor" and "Blitzkrieg."

BELGIANS, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The SPANISH are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

AMERICANS meanwhile are as usual carrying out pre-emptive strikes on all of their allies, just in case.

NEW ZEALAND has also raised its security levels - from "baaa" to "BAAAA!". Due to continuing defense cutbacks (the air force being a squadron of spotty teenagers flying paper airplanes and the navy some toy boats in the Prime Minister's bath), New Zealand only has one more level of escalation, which is "I hope Australia will come and rescue us."

AUSTRALIA, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be all right, mate." Three more escalation levels remain: Crikey!, We Might Need To Cancel The Barbie This Weekend and The Barbie Is Cancelled. So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

Vid Of The Day: Sesame Street (NSFW)

Dave Chappelle tells us why Sesame Street is not a nice place. NSFW = language.

From Kate S.

I'm Not Eating There (Poorly Named Restaurants Of The Day)

File under Engrish and/or Found Porn as well. From Ashley V.

Avoid the white pizza

And such an expensive sign, too.

No thanks, you can have it.

Sure is dark in there

Is that even legal?

When the best won't do!

What kind of "things"?

Try the Revenge Platter for an unforgettable dining experience.

With or without peanuts

Better than schweddy balls, I suppose.

If I could shit gold, I'd keep it to myself

Try the fresh jam

Well... it does make you hungry


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