Thursday, October 8, 2009

Idiot Hillbilly Of The Day

I'm hoping Mrs. Knott isn't related to LOTD regular, Patrick Knott. If so, dude, don't ever ask her for a lift.

From The Smoking Gun.

Stupid Human Trick

Cops: Alabama mother had daughter, 13, ride in box atop minivan

OCTOBER 6 -- Meet Jackie Knott.

The Alabama woman, 37, is facing a child endangerment rap for allegedly having her teenage daughter ride in a cardboard box atop her minivan as it traveled along an interstate highway Saturday morning.

Knott, pictured in the below Albertville Police Department mug shot, told cops that her 13-year-old daughter Haley was serving as a human paperweight to keep the box from falling off the vehicle (and careening down U.S. 431).

While Knott explained that the box was too large to fit inside her van, it is unclear why she did not seek to simply flatten it in an effort to squeeze the box into her crowded vehicle.

When stopped by cops, Knott, a Boaz, Alabama resident, noted that "the box was tied to the van with a clothes hanger," according to a police press release. That assurance did not sway cops, who arrested Knott in the shadow of a Tyson Foods poultry processing facility, according to an October 3 police report. (3 pages)

Vids Of The Day: National Anthem FAIL

From TheMovieGuru. One of these contains brief nudity.

Michael "No-Talent Ass Clown" Bolton. I almost feel sorry for him, but damn, dude, learn the words before you take the stage.

Cuba Gooding, Sr. Forget the money; show him the exit.

If at first you don't suck-ceed...

Lucy Lawless' wardrobe malfunction, years before Janet Jackson's

You're under arrest for assaulting our ears

I think cops need to stick to copping.

Olympian Carl Lewis (audio only). Stick to track, Carl.

Roseanne. What a pig.

This might be my favorite.

Now, to cleanse all that suck from your palate, an amazing version from The Cactus Cuties.

Boob Phrenology Handkerchief Of The Day (NSFW-ish)

Phrenology is an outdated, pseudo-scientific theory stating that personality traits can be derived from the shape of someone's skull. This hanky applies that theory to women's breasts instead. Talk about stereotyping -- although it was almost certainly meant as a gag, and appears to be from the 1950s. It was sent in by a regular reader who wishes to remain anonymous; she found it in her late father's dresser drawer while cleaning out his things and got a kick out of it.

Now where is Ms. Bananas?

Vid Of The Day: Parrot Shag

"Look, he's so happy."

From the BBC series "Last Chance to See" with actor Stephen Fry and zoologist Mark Carwardine.


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